Poor, poor, poor Conrad Black!

Memo To:

The Right Honourable The Lord Black of Crossharbour, PC, OC, KCSG, BA, LLB, MA

From:

David Helwig News director SooToday.com

************************* December 16, 2007

Dear Lord Black:

I regret to inform you that any plans to get your 2008 world domination goals back on track by purchasing SooToday.com in exchange for your remaining assets must be placed on hold.

In addition to concerns about asset valuation, we were just reading in this morning's Toronto Star that those blasted curmudgeons who run the U.S. prison system aren't going to allow you Internet access when you serve your 78-month sentence.

I see that you might be allowed the use of a typewriter in the prison library.

But that's only for legal correspondence, not for writing the much-discussed SooToday.com editorials.

Here, you need to read it yourself!

Sorry M'lord, but I think this deal is deader than Napoleon!

Regards to Lady Black, though.

If she'd like to write a SooToday.com column, I'd be happy to recommend her to Pete Vere.

- David Helwig, SooToday.com