Mother’s Day Reflections

In the grand scheme of "holidays" my favourites are the ones where turkey dinner is served. The others I enjoy for various reasons. I’d like to say I enjoy having the day off, but this has not always been the case: often I had to work on those days.

Then there are a handful of "special" days to celebrate each year: St Patrick’s Day, a perennial favourite; Valentine’s Day, for those who want to pay far too much for cut roses; "Office Professionals Day" (formally known as "Secretaries Day"); and the very popular Father’s Day and, of course, Mother’s Day.

Now, there are some people who call these the "greeting card" days because, except for St Patrick’s Day, they believe them to have been invented by greeting card companies as a way to sell more cards. It is perhaps more accurate to say that the greeting card industry, florists, and indeed the entire retail industry merely recognized a tremendous opportunity available to them.

So, do you know the true history behind Mother's Day?

It was originally started following the US Civil War, as a means of protesting the carnage of that war by women who had lost their sons. In 1870 in Boston, Julia Ward Howe issued a Mother's Day Proclamation which stated, in part:

Arise, then, women of this day! Arise all women who have hearts, whether our baptism be that of water or of tears!

Let them then solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means whereby the great human family can live in peace, each bearing after their own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar, but of God.

In 1913 the US Congress declared the second Sunday in May to be Mother's Day. From that point on, the growing culture of consumerism made Mother’s Day what it is today.

There is a growing sentiment that every day should be Mother’s Day — and Father’s Day, for that matter. It shouldn’t come down to one single day when we show our parents who much we care and appreciate what they mean to us.

In the United Church, the official policy is not to celebrate "Mother’s Day," but instead we observe "Christian Family Sunday." This recognizes the changing complexion of modern families, and acknowledges that, unfortunately, there are those who may not have as good a relationship with their parents as they may wish. For them, they are able to recognize the family they do have — whether natural, extended or adopted.

Still, there’s no denying that Mother’s Day is one of the biggest "holidays" going. Cards and gifts will be presented, along with burnt-toast breakfast in bed, and perhaps a trip later in the day to a Mother’s Day brunch. For myself, the day will bring several moments of personal reflection. In many ways, it will be no different than any other day.

I lost my mother to cancer on 12 September 1993, and there hasn’t been a day since that I have not thought of her.

Whenever something terrific has happened in my life, I think of how I would love to be able to call her and tell her about it, knowing she would share in my happiness and would take pride in my accomplishments.

Whenever something not-so-good happens, I think of how I would love to be able to call her and tell her about it, knowing she would share in my sadness and provide me with the encouragement to deal with the situation.

There have been times when I have been trying, unsuccessfully, to recall a person or a place or an event from my past, and I think of how I would love to be able to call her and ask her about it, because she would remember.

I know that she would be very proud of my recent accomplishments: that I graduated from university with a second degree, this time in Music; that I have been given the opportunity to write this column; that I recently had an article published in a national magazine; that I have been accepted into Teacher’s College.

I miss her terribly, and I miss having the opportunity to share the events of my life with her.

The best I can do now is to continue on, doing the best that I can, and doing the things I enjoy and that make me happy. I know that if I do that, I will be doing what would have made her happy, and would have made her proud of me.

Thanks, mom.