I beg to differ…

Once upon a time, that was how a person might begin to express their disagreement with another’s point of view. Not so anymore.

For some, now, if a person shares an opinion that disagrees with their own, that person can be portrayed as some sort of sycophant or, worse still, subjected to a tirade of verbal abuse and name-calling.

I try not to take such comments personally, recognizing that for some people these sorts of comments have become a personal idiom, much the way some will start a sentence with “Y’know…” or add “eh?” at the end of every other sentence.

I enjoy a vigorous debate, but I much prefer that the tone be kept civil.

For that reason, I shake my head in disbelief every time I see a news clip of our political “leaders” haranguing each other. There was a time when Parliamentary decorum not only promoted but enforced a degree of civility that is currently unknown within the country’s legislatures.

True, the decorum in our legislatures have not deteriorated to the point where fistfights have broken out… unlike what often happens in Taiwan or, as it did this past summer in Alabama. [http://tinyurl.com/yo4fq5]

Ah, for the good old days, when Winston Churchill and Lady Astor would exchange clever barbs.

I suspect that for many the decline in the civility of social exchanges – especially in the semi-anonymous realm of internet postings – is simply a result of a lack of exposure to more courteous examples of debate. Again, our politicians have failed us tremendously in this regard. Even within the school system, debating clubs and the like are few and far between.

Perhaps, in some cases, it is a symptom of a larger societal ill, a general decline in good manners?

I’ve lost count of the number of times I have had people cut me off or crowd me off to the side --- and that’s just in the grocery store! I’ve had people actually reach in front of me to grab something off the shelf, all but shoving me aside while doing so, and never received so much as a “pardon me.”

My own theory is that somehow, perhaps as a result of the “Me Generation” attitude that evolved from the Generation X-ers, consideration towards others has become a rarity.

I’ve gotten used to the fact that people are less likely to hold doors open for others, but it still rankles when I hold the door open and people pass through without saying “thank you.” My response to such incidents is to say “you’re welcome,” just as if they had actually thanked me.

In about half the cases, the person will turn and apologize and offer their thanks.

There is frequent discussion on this site of the effect of a more permissive style of parenting that has been prevalent over the past few decades. One wonders whether it may be the children of such parents who have become adults with no sense of good manners.

Schools can play a small role in promoting the return of manners. Many school boards have embarked on “Character Education” programs. These programs encourage the development of the following character traits: Responsibility, Perseverance, Caring, Self-discipline, Citizenship, Honesty, Courage, Fairness, Respect, and Integrity.

As well, teachers generally encourage, if not outright require their students to demonstrate good manners within the school environment.

Unfortunately, a teacher’s influence only extends so far, and students who are not expected to use the same manners at home or when out in public may only learn that good manners are expected of them when in school.

As I’ve often stated, I have no problem with people expressing their disagreement in a polite manner. Really, I do not expect we can all always agree on everything. What a dull world that would be!

On the one hand, though… if we did all agree, we wouldn’t really need politicians, would we?

Yes, there’d have to be some sort of governmental body to implement and administer various social programs and services as they are identified as being required. But we would eliminate the acrimonious caterwauling that typifies today’s political debates.

We’d also be able to rid ourselves of lawyers, as their primary function is to negotiate agreements between two parties, and seek redress should these agreements be violated.

If we all agreed on everything, this would not be an issue.

But since our society – and indeed, our world – consists of multitude of individuals, with a multitude of differing opinions, we must expect that we will, at times, disagree with each other.

I believe that we can express that disagreement politely, without cause for acrimony.

But… that’s just my opinion.