Victim impact statement by Lynda Bertulli

The following statement by Lynda Bertulli, one of three sisters of Anita Proulx, was read into evidence at a sentencing hearing for Clayton Lapensee today.

Lapensee will be sentenced on February 12 after being convicted of driving while impaired, causing a four-vehicle collision that killed Anita Proulx and injured Amanda Proulx.

On January 17, Lapensee was convicted of driving while impaired and causing a four-vehicle collision that killed Anita Proulx and injured Amanda Proulx.

The full text of Lynda's statement was provided to SooToday.com by Anita's family members.

Their hope is that people who read the statements will gain a clearer understanding of the horrifying damage drinking and driving wreaks upon families and the community at large.

************************* August 29th, 2006/January 2008

To Whom it may concern

Through the tears in my eyes I sit at this computer struggling to keep from crying. Sitting down to compose this letter is one of the most difficult and life defining tasks I have ever had to do. As you can see by the date, I have been putting it off because writing this and putting my feelings to words is accepting that my sister, Anita, is gone forever. Killed in a car accident by someone who had no thoughts of the devastation his actions might bring upon someone and their loved ones. Anita was a wife, mother, grandmother, sister, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law, niece, co-worker, and friend to all who came into her life. This tragic accident should never have happened. Left behind to mourn are her family and friends.

Trying to make sense of the events of November 25, 2005 and those leading up to her eventual death in January 2006 is something I have to deal with daily. At first the shock of the accident itself, then the waiting for word of her condition after being air transported to Sudbury Trauma Center. The agonizing drive to Sudbury, from my home in St. Catharines, and visiting her in that hospital and seeing her broken body lying in that bed, with all those tubes and machines, struggling to keep her warrior spirit alive was something no one should have to endure.

No more can I call or visit with her to see her smile, to hear her laughter when telling of daily events in which she took so much pride. She will never again paint a Santa for me. Anita had a very hard life as a child, losing our mom when she would have been entering her teenage years. She struggled and made a life for herself. She and Ken raised two wonderful children. Her pride in them was apparent when she would tell of their exploits as children. Never again will she be able to tell me of her precious grandchild, Devon, his smile, what he ate, rolling over or all of the joys grandmas love to share about their grandchildren. We will never be able to share our stories of grandchildren to come. Never will she be able to dance up a storm at weddings or parties. Oh, how Anita loved to dance.

I thought when I wrote this statement in August of 2006 it was going to be a start to closure. How wrong I was. Each time this case was adjourned, each time this person used the system to his advantage, the hurt of losing my sister became more and more difficult to deal with. I thought I was going to get on with the grieving process because truly, we can not until justice is served.

Listening to the excuses brought forth each time we were told that the case would go forward brought back the memories of what she must have gone through at the accident, seeing a truck careening toward her knowing that she and her loved ones were going to be seriously injured or possibly die, going up to Sudbury to see her in the hospital bed clinging to life is something I will never forget.

As the months passed and yet another trial date came I found myself crying at the drop of a hat for no apparent reason only to realize I had just been reminded of something which she would have said or liked. Hope that justice would be served this time, only to be disillusioned one more time.

This past week of the trial finally commencing, and I thank the crown attorney and the judge for that, the horrors of that late afternoon were brought clearer to me.

Getting updates from Ken, Kenny and Amanda were heartbreaking. I cannot imagine Amanda having to re-live that terrible day. Ken Sr. not only had to see his daughter, Amanda on the witness stand giving her testimony but he had to listen to accounts from people on what they saw. The ultimate insult of the accused trying to tell his "not so good day" account of what happened only makes this tragedy even more unbearable. Reading accounts of the witnesses in the newspaper did not make things much better. Having this sad event in our lives out there for public scrutiny was most undignified. Trying to make sense of the testimony of the defendant gave no comfort to me. His statement "In my mind that was just a bad scenario, just not my day" was callous and showed me he has no regard for anyone but himself. That statement is something I will never forget for a long, long, time. He can’t begin to understand how that affects me. My sister was a caring, loving person, something I don't believe that not even he can ever be taken away from her with those words. There will be no victory in the outcome of this trial but justice must be served so that those of us who are left to morn can begin the grieving process.

I have cried so many tears, these past months, had so many emotions to sort through I am not sure if I can ever get over what losing my sister has done. There are times when I thought that I had put a lot of the emotions behind me, but not so, they keep resurfacing, again and again each time we revisit the collision, each time someone asks, "How is the trial going? Has anything happened with the trial yet? How are you doing?"

We are left to remember someone who loved cared for all and was loved by all who came into her life. We cry, we laugh, and we remember. We can not forget how tragically she left this life.

My heart goes out to Ken, Kenny, Amanda and her precious Devon. They loved, they laughed and now they cry together trying to piece together their shattered world.

Again, I thank Crown Attorney Glen Wasyliniuk and Justice Tranmer, the police officers involved, all the witnesses, and everyone who helped my sister and her family that day. What they witnessed they would never want to relive and that they will do forever.

Lynda Bertulli Sister of Anita Louise Proulx

************************* Full coverage of today's sentencing hearing Crown seeks five years for Lapensee Victim impact statement by Tricia Proulx-Medaglia Victim impact statement by Ken Proulx Victim impact statement by Renee Schell Victim impact statement by Amanda Proulx Victim impact statement by Kenny Proulx Victim impact statement by Lynda Bertulli

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