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NetSocial Forum for Saturday, Apr. 12 2014

Saturday, April 12, 2014   by: NetSocial TodayWelcome to the SooToday.com NetSocial Forum - a virtual bulletin board where multiple topics are up for discussion, and questions for others in our community can be posted daily.
Comments
23
Note: Comments that appear on the site are not the opinion of SooToday.com. If you see an abusive post, please click the link beside the post to report it.
tea granny 4/12/2014 8:22:49 AM Report

Good morning to everyone in the red room. No rain yet. Maybe we will have a nice Saturday after all. Just relaxing with coffee and a hot cross bun.
mallet 4/12/2014 8:24:47 AM Report


Morning Folks...
Not a bad looking start to the day, broken cloud and sunshine..a little below but nothing we cannot deal with...

Got to go look at some water over the road at Marlette circle as I am on the road board, they tried to clear the culvert, but I guess it was frozen...


Okay School boy howlers, you must know some, get the grey matter moving...

Q what are the Poles doing in Russia??

A Holding up the hydro wires.

Q What is yellow with black triangles in it it??
A Shark infested custard..

Q What is red and comes out of the ground at 150MPH

A An E type carrot..

Oh the memories that brings back... The bullying we sucked up, the cannings we got, Attention deficit didn't exist, teachers said something you listened, discipline was enforced and there were no elective subjects, ah the good old days...
irishfey 4/12/2014 8:48:31 AM Report

Good Morning all.... Feels like rain coming in but who knows.... laundry day today,, wish i could reach the clothesline,, still lots of snow out back... Enjoy you "tea",granny :).. Have a great one....
irishfey 4/12/2014 8:49:11 AM Report

Sorry... " coffee"" lol
celeste5 4/12/2014 9:45:45 AM Report

Good morning everyone.

I have no joke this morning,
But here`s a Redneck Love Poem.

Susie Lee done fell in love,
She plan to marry joe.
She was so happy bout that,
She told her pappy so.

Pappy told her, Susie gal,
You`ll have to find another.
I`d just as soon yo ma don`t know,
but Joe is yo half brother.

So Susie put aside her Joe,
And planned to marry Will.
But after telling pappy this,
He said, there`s trouble still.

You can`t marry Will, my gal,
And please don`t tell you mother.
but, Will and Joe and several mo,
I know is yo half brother.

But mama knew and said, my child,
Just do what makes yo happy.
Marry Will or marry joe,
You ain`t no kin to pappy.
mallet 4/12/2014 10:22:29 AM Report



Celeste...

Yes, neat, I know a few like that, unfortunately they are not for the ears/eyes of some on here...Someone asked for a really English joke so here goes... I hope you all know that Sainsburys is an english grocery chain...

.... Banned from Sainsburys.....

Didn't like shopping there anyway. Yesterday I was at my local Sainsburys store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my Bengie, and was at the checkout, when the women behind me ask if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant, so since I am retired and having little to do, I told here No I didn't have a dog i was starting the Winalot diet again. I added I probably shouldn't, because last time I ended up in hospital, but I had lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms..
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet, the way it works is to fill your pockets with the Winalot nuggets and eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally balanced and works well so I was going to try it again.
The checkout line was enthralled with my story at this point.
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me, I told her no..

I stepped off the kerb to sniff a Irish Setters' ass and a car hit me!!

The guy behind her was laughing so hard I thought he was going to have a siezure..

Now I am banned from sainsburys
celeste5 4/12/2014 10:44:48 AM Report

Mallet

Gee, how much worst can those jokes be.
The one you posted about Father Duffy was a late night joke,
Well, you did post it after 8pm, LOL.
Anyway, I`m glad you won`t be posted any dirty, gross jokes, I wouldn`t want to see you to get banned from this site.

Later
celeste5 4/12/2014 10:46:42 AM Report

I forgot to mention,
The dog food joke was a good one.
redranger 4/12/2014 10:48:41 AM Report

Malley
You may have to explain that the 2 stone he lost was 28 pounds not 2 kidney stones
redranger 4/12/2014 10:50:53 AM Report

Tea Granny
I hope that was a home made hot cross bun... so much better than bakery cardboard.
irishfey 4/12/2014 12:12:37 PM Report

Celeste.. Thank you for that joke. I heard it a long time ago, now i can write it down... I heard it at an Irish Wedding ,lol... More good jokes, .. least i can laugh while i"M stuck here doing the laundry,lol....
mallet 4/12/2014 1:37:56 PM Report


Irishfey

I thought of you...

It started with an Iphone

March was when our son celebrated his birthday and we bought him and iPhone. he loved it, who wouldn't.

I celebrated my Birthday in August and my wife bought me an iPad.

The daughters birthday was in september and we bought her an iPod touch.

My wifes' birthday was in October and I bought her an iRon.

It was around then the fight started.

What my wife failed to recognise is the iRon can be intergrated into the home network with the iWash, iClean and iCook.

This inevitably activates the iNag reminder service...

I should be out of hospital next week...
mallet 4/12/2014 2:00:17 PM Report


And seeing it is the weekend, I thought this might be appropriate..


An elderly man is stopped around 1am, and is asked by the police where he is going at this time of the morning.

He replies "I am going to a lecture about the abuse of alcohol and its effects on the human body'.

The officer the asks "who is going to give a lecture at this time of the night".

The man replies "that would be my wife"..

irishfey 4/12/2014 2:50:51 PM Report

Mallett.. lol.. Served the fella right!.. I liked the one about the old fella getting a " lecture " from his wife. It reminded me of me and hubby years back. I found a better way of getting him, It"s no use giving a lecture at night.. I would wait till the morning then blast him while his head was still pounding ,lol....
Wicket 4/12/2014 5:38:00 PM Report

Mmmm, hot cross buns, does anyone have a good recipe for same - that they have actually made. I know I can find a recipe in any of my cookbooks or even google for one but I would like one that is tried and true, along with yummy and good.
celeste5 4/12/2014 6:43:09 PM Report

Hello

I just recieved this e-mail, LOL.

Breaking News

Wiarton Wille,
The King of The Ground Hog,
was found dead,
From an apparent self-inflicted gun shot wound,
After predicting an early Spring.

Lying Little Buggar!

celeste5 4/12/2014 7:06:22 PM Report

Hello again

I forgot to mention, there was a pic,
Wiarton Wille was lying on his back with the gun on his chest.
mallet 4/12/2014 7:25:45 PM Report



Celeste...

Now you just watch all the anti gun lobby jump on that as being very politically incorrect and that it is okay to commit suicide when things go wrong... This is how far out of wack the attitude of people is... I find it good... you could send me that.... shannoc2@hotmail.com
mallet 4/12/2014 8:01:43 PM Report

Celeste...

Thank you....
celeste5 4/12/2014 8:06:37 PM Report

Mallet

Did you reconize a certain name with that e-mail?
He worked at the Tube mill for years.
I remembered you said that you worked there.
He said that he knew who you were.
irishfey 4/12/2014 8:46:56 PM Report

Nighty night folks.... another good day in here.... God bless....
mallet 4/12/2014 9:18:11 PM Report

Celeste..

I must be honest. I do not check names especially if I intend to forward. I delete them all before I do that, and the other thing is I have a lousy memory for names...but I will go back and check...

mallet 4/12/2014 9:21:30 PM Report


Celeste...

Ah yes... I do remember... Hope he is well and give him my regards...
Comments
23
Note: Comments that appear on the site are not the opinion of SooToday.com. If you see an abusive post, please click the link beside the post to report it.
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